Scared of the first date?

So you’ve been set up by a friend with a certain guy you don’t exactly know too well, and you’re nervous of how it will turn out. It may be with a long time crush you fervently want to impress but scared to do so, or someone totally new that you’ve got no idea how to act in front of. Don’t worry, almost everyone is apprehensive of first dates and you’re not alone. No wonder there are many first date guides in magazines and relationship websites. The following are just two of the more interesting tips I stumbled upon.

Look yourself. Do not waste your time trying too hard to look like someone you’re not. If you naturally love looking glamorous and trendy, then go ahead and be glam. But if you’re the type who’s more comfortable in casual wear, then don’t be afraid to go casual. After all, the point of a date is to be acquainted with someone and to know each other for a possible friendship or relationship. Trying to be someone different just to impress is like fooling him and yourself. Of course, this does not mean you should not look good. Do prepare for the date and be the most beautiful you that you can be.

Do not share or blab too much. So you finally sit on the date and find out that the guy is pleasant and likable. Before you get all comfortable and share your life story, remember that first dates are first dates. Leave a little mystery in the air. Even though a person may seem nice and attracted to you, it takes a lot more for you to really know if someone can be trusted, so take it slow.

Care to share your first date tips?

Image from this site.

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Ending a Relationship

Getting into a relationship, most times, seems like the hardest thing to do. Dating and then having to come to the point where you are in a monogamous relationship. Breaking up can be something most of us have a hard time doing. Because of this, we end with people we don’t want to be longer than we should. You need to understand that breaking up IS hard to do.

  1. Be really ready to leave the relationship –  you have to know it is over and you are not going back, no matter what.
  2. Leave on good terms –  emotions sometimes get in the way and you may be leaving someone hurt and diminished. You want to leave in a good way so that you won’t have to deal with, let’s just say a stalker.
  3. Make sure you are ready for any groveling or begging they may try – you may feel bad and start to want to try and look over all the issues and work it out. If you are ready to leave, leave. Don’t stay because of sympathy.
  4. Timing is everything – don’t kick ’em while they are down. If your not-so better half is having some hard times, this may not be the best time to drop the bomb shell. If at all possible, wait until things are a little more steady and then let them know, it’ s just not working out for you.
  5. If we can’t be lovers, we can’t be friends – Ex’s as friends rarely work. Do each other and your future relationships a favor, end all ties. You can’t be cool with an ex. Leave them simply as the ex.
  6. Safety First – if it was a turbulent relationship, use your good senses and don’t do a break up alone. Find the right way to end it. You may need to do it, a terrible option, by email or phone.

Ending a relationship can be the hardest thing you may have to do. Anytime a person’s feeling and life is involved there can be difficulty with your choices. Make sure you are making the best decisions for your own healthy relationship status and sanity.

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Flirt without being "A Flirt"

Flirting can be fun and innocent. But you don’t want to come across as “A Flirt”. There a subtle hints you can give to let him know you are interested without coming on too strong. You don’t want to seem easy, or a tease. The key is to be low-key. These little hints can land you a date without taking the risk of being shot down.

Body Language – give off the correct body language to let him know you are interested. Make eye contact, stand near him, lean in to him when talking or listening to him, if in a group conversation innocently talk toward him. Try to stay focused to him.

High heels – High heels make you feel and look sexy. So, by wearing these you will demand attention when you walk by. You will also not that you walk with more of a twist and will feel sexier, hence you will look sexier.

Touch – When you are talking to him, find a time of conversation interest to touch him while you are talking. As an example, when you are agreeing with him, touch his hand as you nod, smile, or laugh in agreement. Seems fairly innocent while at the same time a bit flirty to him.

Stroke your collar bone – While you are listening to someone talking make sure you are in clear view of him and slowly stroke your collar bone/neck area. For added flirtation(if wearing a skirt or dress) rub your lower leg while it is crossed.

These are some great flirt techniques. Try them out and see what results you get. You are sure to get him interested and intrigued by you.

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Super Concentrated Pheromone

pheromone1 I recently was informed of a new product out called Super Concentrated Pheromone it is sold on, a site about pheromones. This product comes specific for either men or women, and is said to be completely harmless with no side effects. Pheromones are secreted by us and can trigger social or sexual behaviors. This product has taken pheromones and scientifically manipulated them to create an animal type magnetism to the opposite sex. I read the testimonials about this product and it seems to give even the shyest of people a big boost of confidence or self assurance. We all could use a little more of both. Anyone having no luck in love or would just like more attention from the opposite sex will love to try this product.

Women and men both can benefit from this product, which boasts a “100% guarantee that it will change your life”. Powerful words for what perhaps may be a powerful product. It can be purchased on the site, and you can also learn more about human pheromones at the same time.If the Super Concentrated Pheromone does what is says, we could be looking at a major change in the dating scene. Imagine, a man no longer having to approach women, the women come straight to him. Be careful men this product may keep you busy Whew

It makes me wonder, what about the unsuspecting victim? Are they generally interested in you, or is it all the product? What happens when the Super Concentrated Pheromone wears off? Will you be left with the Love Potion No. 9 effect, where it’s like getting over a drunken binge, and you don’t know what came over you?

Still, it is pretty cool to think you can put a little of this product on and you will become irresistible to the opposite sex. It has to be a big boost to the ego and increase self esteem to have people falling all over you. This link will take you to a page about human pheromones, it is very intriguing….it may make you a believer of pheromones, if you aren’t already. The Super Concentrated Pheromone product sounds a little too good to be true, but I know about pheromones already, so it seems possible. I definitely am interested in trying it Winking.

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Dating Stress

Dating can be a source of stress for many people, not only women, but men also feel stressed when going in a date.

There are a few tips that can help us feel a little bit more comfortable while on a date with our prospective Mr./Ms. Right.

If you find yourself thinking that maybe you are not his/her type during a date. Then you should think back and remember what I said in a previous post, think of a date as a job interview where you are the one making the questions. That way you’ll be just watching at him trying to impress you, and you’ll be enjoying the date.

If you are the kind of person who is always afraid of doing something embarrassing, then you should just relax and think of the embarrassing moment as a test. By seeing him/her reacting to help you or laugh at you will give you an early opinion about your date’s human side. Remember that nobody is perfect, nobody will be perfect during the date and at the same moment you are thinking about doing something embarrassing, you are wasting time that you are supposed to use in enjoy the date.

Some people go on a date thinking about the other as if he/she was “the one”, and some other people just worry that they might not like their date. Here is what you should do, relax and take a date just like a fun moment with someone that might or might not be “the one”. Before of during the date you should never think about the future. You shouldn’t worry if you want to see him/her again or not, just wait until the date is over and then decide if you want to see him/her again. Never play games. If you really do want to see him/her, then let him/her know, but if you don’t really want to see him/her, is better to tell him/her in that moment. You can be very polite and the other person will appreciate your honesty and will feel safe that you are not playing games. So stop worrying about the future and enjoy the present!

These are just some of the stressing thinking most people have during a date. You should feel relieved that you are not the only one having them, and by identifying them and finding a way to forget about it, you’ll be able to enjoy your date 100%.

What are your other dating stressing ideas?

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As a continuation to my previous post about going back to the dating scene, here’s another idea of things you shouldn’t do on a date. Sometimes we make these mistakes because we are very nervous on the first dates specially, or as a consequence for previous experiences. A first date is usually the first and deepest impression the other person will have of you, I’m sure that most of the time you don’t even want to see the person you date after a bad first date. So here’s a small guide of all those things that leave a really bad impression on your date:

DON’T be late or cancel your date: Nobody like to be stud up, so if you decide you don’t want to go on that date in the last minute, or if something extremely important came up, apologize in a polite way, call before the date time arrives and make sure to send at least a “Sorry message” for canceling or being late. For woman is sometimes ok to be late, but if you are going to be more than 30 minutes late to your date, for traffic or work reasons, make sure to call him and ask him to wait for him and offer to make it up for him by paying taxi or doing something he’ll appreciate.

DON’T have a bad appearance: Looking tired, sick or messy is definitely a date’s turn off. As I’ve said before is not about wearing the most expensive outfit but about looking clean and tidy. You should shave, comb your hair properly, apply some make up if you really know how to, otherwise is even better not to wear any make up and make sure your outfit and make up are appropriated for the dating place.

DON’T talk about sex/finances/politics/religion/work: These are very controversial topics that you shouldn’t be bring out on a date unless you really dislike him and just want to pick up a fight. Otherwise is never advisable to talk dirty or about sex, finances, politics or religion on a date, especially not in a first date. It’s definitely very important to learn about your date’s point of view about a certain topic, there are other ways and other occasion to do it. Unless your job is very interesting and will take you to a very animated conversation, avoid the talk about works, you don’t want him to think you are a workaholic and he definitely doesn’t need to know about your coworker’s conflicts.

DON’T talk about your ex: Your date doesn’t need or want to know about who wonderful your ex was, or how bad he was and the way he broke your heart. Try to avoid at all cost the “ex” talk. If you are still in love or hurting about your ex boyfriend or husband, your date is the wrong person to talk about it. Try to look at your new date as a completely new opportunity, as the beginning or something hopefully good, so never mix it with the sad memories from the past.

DON’T make plans for the future: Some women go on dates asking is that’s the right guy, the “one”, the future husband and father of her kid’s…big mistake. When going on a date you should never feel the pressure of starting a long lasting relationship. When you go on a date you should try to meet the person first and then take things slowly. Some men are really afraid of commitment, even if they are on a relationship already, so imagine what a turn off for a man to hear you talking about a future or a family together. It’s ok to let him know that you wish to meet/date him again, but be very careful to use the right words to give the right idea.

DON’T pick a fight: Whether it is with him, or with the driver, or the waitress, or just the woman staring at your guy, picking up a fight while on a date is a no-no situation. Women are supposed and expect to be feminine, sweet, understanding and polite, so picking up a fight during your date you’ll scare most man. They need to know that you are a responsible and patient person, who’ll listen and try to solve problems with words.

DON’T look bored or sad: If you look bored, tired or sleepy, your date will pick up the signs that the date is going wrong, and it will create a really uncomfortable situation. So even if you really are bored on the date, try not to stare are the ceiling or the floor, try not to play with your folk, try not to look at your watch every five minutes, or to check your phone for calls or messages, and definitely try not to strike up a conversation with someone around you. If you really are bored and don’t wish to continue on the date, try making an early morning excuse to go back home, that way he won’t feel completely bad about the bad date and you’ll avoid all the time killing techniques we hate so much.

DON’T make or accept work calls: If you know you are going on a date, make sure to clear your schedule for that time, so you won’t be getting annoying work calls in the middle of your romantic dinner. If can’t empty a few hours of your schedule to be on a date, your date will feel like there’s no time enough for him at all in your life.

I hope this few tips were useful and you’ll avoid them on your next date.
What have been your worst dating mistakes?

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As a continuation to my post on going back to the dating scene, this is another post on dating. Once you have chosen and are ready to start dating after a bad break-up or widowhood, your first date will probably be the hardest one. You’ll be nervous and even embarrassed. While there are no specific rules to have a perfect date, there are certain measures you can take to look your best and have a successful date. Here are a few and probably the top nine dos of dating:

DO be punctual: Punctuality is definitely the first thing about you that your date will notice. While punctuality can be more accepted for women, most man don’t really like a woman who takes one hour to get ready to go on a date. If you have arrangements to meet on a place, try getting dressed as early as possible and be on time, if he’s coming to your place to pick you up, then make sure you have already tried every possible outfit to wear, so when he arrives you’ll be ready.

DO have great personal appearance: You should always wear nice clean cloths while on a date. You don’t need to wear and expensive outfit, but you have to make sure that your date feels comfortable with you. You can wear sexy cloths, but never over do it, or you will be sending the wrong message to your date. Try to wear something fashionable and according to the place you are going because you should also feel comfortable in what you are wearing to avoid another cause of stress on your date.

DO Smell Nice: This might be included in the personal appearance part, but I chose to separate it because the smell is usually not taking too seriously. To most people there’s nothing like a woman with a nice irresistible scent. You should choose a scent that is not too strong or too sweet. You should find a scent that is sweet and at the same time sexy. Be careful not to over do it, and choose a perfume that is right for the occasion, for a sports or camping date you shouldn’t wear the same perfume than for a dinner date. And one last details, in most perfumes, less in better.

DO be Complimentary: Always compliment your date, man also like getting compliments and it shows that you paid attention to them and that you care about what they do. You not only need to compliment his outfit, but you can compliment his punctuality or his choice of the place. Whatever it is that you decide to compliment, do it from your heart, don’t just do it because is a rule, but because you want him to feel comfortable around you.

DO Smile: Is official that smiling draws people to you, a smile is like a magnet to others. People usually feel better around smiling people and me are definitely more attracted towards women who like and know how to smile. A smile makes you look relaxed, happy and confident. All this said there’s no need to keep explaining why smiling is so important on a date. As long as you smile your date will also feel relaxed and he’ll know that everything is going well and you are happy with his company.

DO be humorous: A sense of humor is important in every situation, but is something that you should pay a lot of attention. Most man like a woman with a good sense of humor, a woman that can make really funny and sexy jokes, a woman that can always find a funny side to any situation. You should be careful not to end up doing racist or impolite jokes; they can give a really bad impression about you. And never ever make fun of your date or someone around you.

DO Flirt: Women can also flirt, and men enjoy it. On a date you should definitely have a little flirt, which will make him feel sexy and attractive. You should be very careful though; no man likes a woman who is throwing yourself to him. Of course you should be careful not to make him feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.

DO Have fun: Whether your date is at a park, at a club or at a restaurant, make sure you have fun. This is not only to make your date feel well but for you, dates can be very fun actually, just think about the fact that you get to go to a nice place with a nice person that might even become a serious relationship in the future. So I’m sure you’ll want to remember your first date as a fun experience. But even if the date doesn’t work, which is possible, at least you’ll have had nice time out.

DO Offer to pay the bill: I would even say help pay the bills. Most of the time men are expected to take care of the bills, but is always nice and highly appreciated that a woman offers to pay, that’ll show him that you are independent and self supported and that specially you didn’t go there for the free stuff. Even if you have no interest at all on paying the bill, show him that you have the means and intention to do it.

I hope this few dating dos can help you have a merrier and more successful date and if the first one doesn’t work, it doesn’t matter, there will be better ones in the future.
Dates should be about having fun and getting to know new people, not actually about meeting your future husband or your kid’s father.

And as I said before, the guy is usually as nervous as you are, so try to make this experience relaxed and enjoyable for him too.

What are your personal dating dos?
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